Fearless Reason

Fearless reason in an age of frightened absurdity.

Tag: contemplation

Sanctification: A Love Story

Sanctification is not about self-denial. It is a love story. It is about falling in love with the deepest and truest aspect of our being. It is about falling in love with god. After that, everything that separates us from god simply starts falling away. Sanctity does not require us to deny anything. It asks us only for our attention. It asks only that we love god and our neighbor more than ourself. Sanctity does not call us to self denial, it calls us to be the truest version of ourselves. It calls us to ignore distractions and shed our false self.

Inward Regression or Outward Reform

Though I have undergone drastic internal transformation since my awakening, the external aspects of my life have been more resistant to change. Each year brings gradual reform to my habits, circumstances, and outward identity. But the outward circumstances of my life are ever lagging behind who my soul is calling me to be.

Since 2011 I have changed political affiliations, cities, jobs, adopted a daily meditation practice, become a vegetarian, and have found spiritual community. There are many other outward changes I might list, but these are a few that stick out. What is most notable about these changes is that all of them have slowly been moving me towards a more loving and peaceful way of being in the world.

Over the years I have come to see a decided pattern to these periods of change. Each major change is preceded by a prolonged period of discomfort and unhappiness. A circumstance or habit simply has to become unbearable to my soul, until finally, I reach a point where I must choose between inward regression or outward reform.

I am still moving toward a more perfect alignment between my soul and outward circumstances. But as I become more inwardly peaceful, I have become more acutely aware of those places in my life of tension, discomfort, and unhappiness. I know what makes me happy and what does not, and I know the direction I need to move in, if not the destination.

I Noticed God Noticing Me

Did I notice god, or was I noticed? I think he must have always been there, waiting to be seen. Supporting me as he supports the universe, with tenderness and infinite love. Always reaching for me, and waiting patiently for me to reach back. Yes, that must be it. I noticed god noticing me, and I reached back.

I noticed god noticing me and reached back, and I was welcomed by a bounty of bliss. I was invited into the divine dance between finite mankind and our infinite god. But we aren’t just dancing, we are drawing closer.

I prayed that there be no separation between us. I prayed for all that does not serve my highest good and the good of others be taken away. I prayed for sanctity. I prayed for the dance to never end and that I be drawn into unending union.

I prayed many prayers, with no small amount of trepidation. How I sympathize with St. Augustine’s wayward words, “Lord make me pure, but not yet!” But the time for wayward prayers has passed.

Seek God Within

It is sad to see the spiritual ambition of seekers without a contemplative practice turn to heresy. It is only by our regular pilgrimage to the well of faith that we cultivate discernment, and purify our hearts and minds. Those who forego this sacrament inevitably get lost in the false corridors of the analytical mind, and worship the false gods of their ego. Forsake heresy and seek union with god through inner silence.

Unbend your neck.
Get off your knees.
Sit upright with poise.
Seek god within.

In Silence

In silent
surrender
I purify
my soul.

In silence.

I cleanse
my mind
and open
my heart.

Finding myself.

Formless
creature
of the
now.

In silence.

I grow
virtue
and god.

Finding myself.

Timeless
creature
of love
and bliss.

In silence.

I vanquish
darkness
with the
presence of
light.

Finding myself.

Awareness
in an
awakening
world.